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Wednesday, December 10, 2008

I'm afraid to admit that I'm scared.

I'm blogging, just for Audrey. (:

I've got a lot of feelings, and a lot of thoughts. I don't know where they come from, but sometimes I'd really like to just shut my brain down and tell myself to fuck off.
I like someone? Well, I guess two people. But I told one I didn't want to do anything because I liked the other. I mean, I don't want to date anyone, but I feel weird just liking and messing around with two guys at the same time. Ha, I don't know. I'm afraid that things are gonna be weird now that I said something, like I'll regret it, but oh well. I think I'm just paranoid, really.

Also, everyone's talking about these colleges they got accepted to and it freaks me the fuck out because I haven't applied to any yet. =/
I used to be excited for growing up and now I'm just absolutely terrified.
I don't want to apply, it's too much work.
I don't want to even go because I'm afraid of being alone, and everyone's just going different places.
I just don't want to face life, or reality.
I want to go back to being a little kid when everything was a million times easier.
I need a hottie with a time machine, please. (: Hahah.

Oh, and I'm pretty sure people should stop trying to talk to me about Stephen.
Because I really don't give a fuck.

Basically. I am so fucking scared of the future, to the point where I just don't want to deal with it. AT ALL.
fuck my life. hah.


miss feedmekicks* said...

so, im pretty sure that this fucking wireless better not go out or else im killing mr guinn tomorrow.

il slit his throat with my fail card.

as we already found out, people who are insecure and jealous will tlak shit.. so if anything is said about you and who you like and who your dont date, its just because they have perosnal issues.

my fail card can sure make due for two murders instead of just one, if thats the case.

you are old enough to make your own decisions.

so do it. dont listne ot what anybody else says.

& as for being scared in a total general manner- i am too. if you havent noticed.

im not even excited about college anymore like i used ot be.

Posey said...

Hey girl, i tagged you on my blog, read my post.